Sometimes I wonder if my high school kids would be more attentive if I transformed my room into a haunted mansion while we study Gothic literature. It bears investigation.
I have to admit that my enthusiasm was late blooming this year. I have been obsessing over a situation over which I have absolutely no control. Angry. Depressed. Angry again. Depressed again. Vicious cycle that I couldn't seem to break. I decided to ignore it. I decided to respond. I decided not to respond. I whined. A LOT. I talked about it. A LOT.
And then this morning during worship we sang a children's song by Zach Jones.
"...When I don't get to have my own way
I will trust in You
For You know what is best
When tears begin to roll down my face
I will trust in You
For You are good, You are good.
Perfect in power, You control all things.
Perfect in wisdom, You know everything.
Perfect in goodness,
Jesus, You're so good to me,
So good to me.
Sovereign One
You work all things to Your plan.
Sovereign One,
You hold all things in Your hands."
I had apparently forgotten that God holds both the things I understand and the things I don't. He's with me when I feel as if I am being treated fairly and when I feel that I am not. His plan is to use every circumstance to show me His love for me and to transform me into a vessel He can use for my good and His glory.
El Roi. The God who sees.
It put things in perspective. It cleared my mind, just like that. And now I'm free to get down in the floor with those preschoolers and tell them stories about a God who sees them, too. And in a few weeks when I stand in front of those high school kids again, He'll still be watching and holding me and working all things to His plan, even when things in my life don't make a whole lot of sense.
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